Friday, July 8, 2011

Love in a Nutshell

Sneak Peek Friday

I am honored to have worked on the Academy of Coaching Parents International's HeartWise book called Parenting Responsively for Connection. Along with 10 other ACPI Certified Parent and Family Coaches, I wrote the book to help parents answer some difficult parenting issues. Every Friday this summer YOUR Parenting Question Blog will share a short excerpt from this book. We hope that you find them information and helpful. If you like what you read and you would like to order the E-book you may do so here at Strong Roots Family Coaching.

Love in a Nutshell

We start on our parenting journey with the great expectation of having unconditional love for our children, but honestly, giving unconditional love is easier for some parents than it is for others. From the moment a mother feels a kick in her womb or sees an ultrasound picture of her growing baby, she may fall in love. For other parents, that love may not blossom until their baby is born. And for some, this magical moment happens way after their baby is born. Regardless of when a parent falls in love with her baby, her love is timeless because love is timeless. It’s never too early or too late for a human being to love.

Most of us would agree that we have the expectation that parents should unconditionally love their children. That's the idea we've grown up with. In fact it's more than an idea. It's the ideal. However, I wonder whether we all act out of unconditional love each time we interact with our children.

When this idea of unconditional love is not reflected in our behavior, love is degraded to being only a concept. Thinking ‘I love my child’ but acting unloving while catering to his needs is a situation where love becomes only a concept. My earlier example about my parents’ declaration of their love for me to others without a direct act towards me is a good example of love being reduced to a concept.

As parents, we sometimes have the idea of parental love in our minds but forget to translate this into meaningful expressions of love towards our children. Thinking love and showing love are clearly two different things.